I have long wanted to place to share the songs and music of my heart, but can I be honest? I struggle. In this world of likes and follows and “influencers” it seems that sharing can quickly become something I would never desire for it to be…all about me. Yet, three weeks ago something happened that really spurred my heart to stop overthinking and just start sharing the hope that I possess.
My mom and I have always been very close and I had been noticing some very small personality changes, mainly that she seemed tired and much less energetic than normal. My concern grew and on our way to a musical in Kansas City I believe God intervened. She spoke of a headache and was even more lethargic. We happened to be by a small rural hospital so we decided to take her there for an examine. The doctor seemed confident we would be back on the road in no time as he said she seemed perfectly healthy. However, after a quick CAT scan he told us some hard news. “The scan is not normal.” The scan revealed several masses in her brain. The words we shocking and yet, I believe God had already graciously been preparing my heart for that moment. They transported her by ambulance an hour and a half away to the Neuro ICU.
The days that followed were filled with tests and waiting and lots of doctors….and more than anything, uncertainty. They said the tumors were likely the results of cancer in another area of the body however a scan showed nothing, so they did a brain biopsy.
Two weeks later we received some difficult news. The doctor said that the pathology is consistent with high grade malignant tumor. At this point surgery is not an option. We have an appointment this week with oncology/radiology to get a plan moving forward.
The news breaks my heart, yet I am also so thankful for the years of love and hope and FAITH that she has poured into me. As painful as it has been to process I am so thankful for the amazing health of my Mom. You wouldn’t know she has multiple brain tumors. She can walk and talk and laugh and…. SING. And that is why my heart immediately felt compelled to do…sing. My mom put a violin in my hands at the age of three and I honestly can’t remember a day without the gift of music. Over the years we have sang, played, rejoiced, worshipped, lamented all though the beautiful gift of music. Normally right now she would be getting ready to lead our church in worship, but since that's not possible this morning we are going to share a song here.
The Bible tell us to encourages one another with song, hymns and spiritual songs…. to sing and make music in your heart to the Lord. We pray that this simple and imperfect rendition of "God is Bigger than any Mountain," will encourage you today!
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